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Essay for Adagio in G minor for Strings and Organ by Albinoni


Love – is a tragic feeling.
Real one.
One and Only.
Not just a dream about it, not fake, not false, not convenient feeling and sure not just a means for the sex.
That is the feeling, when one person fufills the whole of your world.
And everything, the whole life becomes – only Him.
You see other people, events and things only with His eyes …
All, everything is connected with him.

Love would not become a carefree happiness.
I do not know whether there is generally a happy love.
If Love could be happy at all…
In the most common sense: when it getting easier to live; when there’s wings behind your back, and life smiles at you, and everyone seems like happy, because YOU are so happy …

Love is a hard feeling.
With a dark shroud it covers the sun and daylight, and there is no enough air to breath because He is away …
There is no light, because He is away of you.

But when He is near … there is also no lightness and happiness.
Because … He will never become close enough to you … even in the most intiem moments.
Because… the thirst of the complete – and impossible Unity tormented soul, tearing the heart with….
Because there is no absolute and complete fusion of souls, hearts, thoughts … and every look and every thought which is not about YOU fills the soul with a poison …
Every second is fulfilled with the bliss of love and passion – as dark as it’s velvety southern sky …

It is fatal – such a Love.
True Love.
It will never become weaker, but it will exhaust you …
It will burn the soul, break the life, you will become moody and sad, light joy goes from your life.
But still … cursing and complaining, you’re ready to give your life for this feeling to stay with you forever!